Diana Gail "G-Ma" Stewart - Victoria Honouree

2023 IG Wealth Management Walk for Alzheimer's

“She was the most caring, giving person in the entire world. She loved her granddaughters and her family so much.”

When Kelly Kurta describes her mother Gail and the dementia journey their family went on, she focuses on her mother’s strength and commitment to caring for others – values that have been passed down through the generations.

Gail dedicated her life to the safety of others, working for the Department of National Defence and with the RCMP at E-Division in Victoria. A single mother, she raised Kelly on her own in Victoria with the help of her parents. Kelly later put down roots in the Lower Mainland, but the family remained close.

Kelly’s youngest daughter Mackenzie, whose friends and her nicknamed Gail “G-Ma,” moved to Victoria in 2013 to be closer to her grandmother and to finish high school. Shortly after the move, Mackenzie and Kelly’s friend noticed Gail losing weight and struggling with daily tasks. Gail began losing track of time, spending hours shopping while forgetting the items she went for and had many challenges doing daily tasks such as laundry and cooking. Unintentionally, Mackenzie became a caregiver, and this responsibility took a toll on her mental health.

Worried about both her mother and daughter, Kelly and her husband Rory moved back to Victoria, while still balancing work in Vancouver. The two commuted back and forth for nearly two years before the family decided together that Rory would leave his career to care for Gail.

As Gail’s condition declined, her family tried to advocate for her, but unfortunately, they didn’t feel heard by their doctor. Gail was eventually seen by a gerontologist, who, after Rory detailed an especially strange incident, referred Gail to a neurological specialist at Royal Jubilee.

Gail’s condition did not present in a typical way and as a result, she could not be formally diagnosed with dementia. She always recognized who her family was but lost other cognitive ability quickly. Gail’s physical abilities began to decline rapidly as well, which eventually required hospital care.

First in acute care, she received excellent care and physical exercise every day. However, a painful period began for the family when the hospital pushed for Gail’s move to extended care. Kelly and family were out of the country at the time and felt pressured to make a quick decision.

The transfer was traumatic for Gail. She was erroneously flagged as “wheelchair bound” and did not walk for two weeks. Kelly was horrified to see with how little respect and dignity her mom was given. In the worst incident, Gail was assaulted by another patient and Kelly was not informed, finding out only a week later when discovering the bruises. Kelly and her family still struggle with regret: they question if they made the right choices for Gail’s care.

Still, there were glimmers of light throughout the experience. Gail was able to remember many things, including her family.

“We would walk into her room and she would mouth our names or give us a smirk or we would say ‘If you remember this, squeeze my hand’ and she would,” Kelly recalls. Her eldest granddaughter, Kaelin, would play Gail her favourite songs, while Mackenzie would read her books.

Kelly and her daughters stayed with Gail on the last night of her life, enjoying music, drinks and laughter. In the morning they stepped out and, within minutes, Kelly received a call that her mom’s condition had rapidly declined. Gail died before Kelly and her girls made it back to the room.

But the story doesn’t end there. Because her dementia symptoms didn’t fit the criteria for any specific diagnosis, Gail had requested years prior that her brain be donated for research. UBC’s Medical Department was grateful for the opportunity and carefully transported Gail's entire body for study – and at Kelly’s request, the students, just like her own granddaughters, call her G-Ma.

Since her mom’s death, Kelly has become involved with the IG Wealth Management Walk for Alzheimer’s. As Chair of the volunteer organizing committee in Victoria, she is helping plan the event – a monumental way to honour Gail and her incredible contributions to the community through many decades.

For Kelly, it will be emotional to walk with her husband and daughters through the neighbourhood where she and Gail grew up, but thanks to the woman who raised her, she’s ready.

“My mom gave me a lot of strength,” she says.

Join Kelly on Sunday, May 28 at the Victoria IG Wealth Management Walk for Alzheimer's. Together, we make memories matter.